Q: What's the difference between a monkey and a flea? 

A: A monkey can have fleas, but a flea can't have monkeys. 

猴子会和跳蚤有什么不同呢？你可能会直接的想到它们俩是一大一小。但除此之外呢，那就是猴子身上可以长跳蚤，而跳蚤身上却不能有猴子。

Q: How can you most irritate a farmer? 

A: By treading on his corn? 

如果你踩了农夫的玉米或是谷物，他肯定会生气的；而如果你踩了农夫脚底的鸡眼，他会更生气。Corn既可以表示“玉米/谷物”，也有“鸡眼”的意思。 

Q: Which is the strongest creature in the world? 

A: The snail. It carries its house on its back. 

因为snail（蜗牛）的后背上总是背着一所房子，所以说蜗牛是世界上最强壮的生物是不足为奇的。你说呢？ 

Q: What do people do in a clock factory? 

A: They make faces all day. 

一看到make faces这个短语，你可千万别以为是在钟表厂工作的人整天都做鬼脸呀！因为除了这个意思以外，它还可以从字面上解释为制造钟面。 

Q: How do you stop a sleepwalker from walking in his sleep? 

A: Keep him awake. 

怎样才能不让梦游者（sleepwalker）梦游（walk in his sleep）呢？最简单的方法就是不让他睡觉。虽然这不是治疗方法，但如果让梦游者醒着呢，他的确就不会去梦游了。 

funny pick up lines.You may fall from the sky,u may fall from a tree,but the best way to fall is in love with me.

Kid's Perspective

孩子的视角

On the way home from the first day of school, the father asked his son, "What did you do at school today'?"

在上学第一天回家的路上，父亲问儿子，“你今天在学校做了什么?”

The little boy shrugged his shoulders and said, "Nothing".

小男孩耸耸肩说:“没什么。”

Hoping to draw his son into conversation, the father persisted and said, "Well, did you learn about any numbers, study certain letters, or maybe a particular color?"

为了把儿了引到谈话中来，父亲继续着话题，说道:“那么，你学习了任何数字、字母或者也许什么特定的颜色吗7”

The perplexed child looked at his father and said, "Daddy, didn't you go to school when you were a little boy?"

困惑的孩子看着父亲说:“爸爸，难道你是一个小男孩的时候没有上过学吗?”

Fox and cock
One morning a fox sees a cock.He think,"This is my breakfast.''He comes up to the cock and says,"I know
you can sing very well.Can you sing for me?''The cock is glad.He closes his eyes and begins to sing.The fox sees that and caches him in his mouth and carries him away.
The people in the field see the fox.They cry,"Look,look!The fox is carrying the cock away.''The cock says to the fox,"Mr Fox,do you understand?The people say you are carrying their cock away.Tell them it is yours.Not theirs.''
The fox opens his mouth ang says,"The cock is mine,not yours.''Just then the cock runs away from the fox and flies into the tree.

狐狸和公鸡
一天早上，一只狐狸看到了一只公鸡。他想：这是我的早餐。
他朝公鸡走来，对他说：“我知道，你能唱得非常好听，你能唱给我听么？”公鸡很高兴。他闭上眼睛开始唱歌。狐狸看到这些抓住它放到自己的嘴里走了。
在田地里的人们看到了狐狸。大喊大叫：“看，看！狐狸抓住公鸡逃走了。”公鸡对狐狸说：“狐狸先生，你能理解么？人们认为你叼走了他们的公鸡。告诉他们这是你的，不是他们的。”
狐狸张开他的嘴说：“公鸡是我的，不是你们的。”就在那时，公鸡逃离了狐狸并藏到了树底下。